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The Council Hostage Seizure.

Background.

Everywhere one looks nowadays, someone is being held hostage. From our homes to our workplaces and even in our bordellos we are not safe from the terror of Urban Guerillas. The concept of the Urban Guerilla was laid out by the Brazilian Carlos Marighela and acted upon by such groups as the Tupamarus in Uruguay and the Red Army Faction in West Germany. Since Brazil is the land of television and orphan killing, it is only reasonable to see how successful the concept of Urban Guerillas has been. One look at the innumerable Marixst-Leninist and Maoist states in most of Latin America and Europe gives credance to the viability of such a theory. If you are not careful, you will be next, gringo.

The Event.

On the dark and stormy night of February 12, 1998 during a quiet League of Doom meeting at an ASM council session, a band of wiley urbane guerillas stormed in. The group, armed with squirt guns and masses of fetal tissue, first pushed its way past a lowly security guard and filled the conference room. The group was the militant A.E.I.O.U. branch of the TFT and sported sexy black outfits.

After a few quick revelries and dead gringos, the group read off a list of demands. But the oppressive regime would not have it that way. While informing the group that their demands would be met and that the helicopter was on its way, University Fuzz officers came on the scene. After a few brief exchanges of gunfire and the betrayal of the revolution, an amusing little dialogue took place:

Fuzz: I want all you people out of here.
TFT member 1: All of us students?
Fuzz: No, all you people in your funny little costumes.
TFT member 2 [pointing to the fuzz]: Oh, like you?

The Fuzz then confiscated the weapons and patrolled the premises. Various verbal arguments broke out. The League of Doom were made to look like complete fools and tools of the man. A couple council members, bothered by the presence of the Fuzz, angrily left the room. Eventually the meeting lost so many council members (six to stray bullets) that there was no quorum and the meeting was cancelled.

Meanwhile, the disarmed revolutionaries resorted to non-violent passive resistance methods, such as a boot to the head. They danced, played games and ate pizza. Then they were carted off to detention camps.

Oh well.

The A.E.I.O.U. Manifesto.

SEE:

The fuzz and a guerilla. [60k]
The ongoing situation. [54k]
More fuzz. [32k]
Negotiations. [29k]
The agony of the crisis. [24k]
The A.E.I.O.U. commandos.(publicity pose) [42k]

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tft@stdorg.wisc.edu